take me away. come, kill me. i have nothing left to live for. i'm in so much pain... even with a second chance, it wouldn't make a difference. so why do i keep hoping for it? why do i stay on? i can't even cry anymore. the tears remain in my eyes, blurring my vision. everyday, i think about you. i can't focus on anything. teachers are complaining that i've deproved a lot since beginning of year. that i've not been paying attention, that my mind's somewhere else. even now. i just wish for it to all end. why did i make such a promise? to love you forever... to love you and only you... to dedicate my everything to your wellbeing... even at my own expense... and i can't break that promise... even when you've already let go of 'us', you still want me to continue loving you... you've left me to rot in the past... to live in this long forgotten fantasy... for what? so you could delight in my suffering? i'm losing it, and you don't even seem to care... would you even care if i died bleeding? all our memories... i just want to bury them all... but it keeps coming back... haunting me... i just want to let go and forget...... maybe... i trusted you too much... i believed in everything you said... everything you said... was a lie... sigh. curse me for having such a good memory of useless things... i wonder... can anyone take this pain away...?

Labels: long reflection